Wednesday, June 14, 2006


Benji Schwimmer gets hella funky!

Benji Schwimmer looks stupid adorable in hats!!

Benji Schwimmer showed his abs!!!!

Benji Schwimmer can do the splits!!

My future husband!!! Can DO THE SPLITS!!!

Benji Schwimmer's loser of an ex-girlfriend is probably contemplating self-imposed exile from all of humanity. At the very least.

Benji Schwimmer doesn't "get close to girls like that. At least not until [he's] married." (TO ME!!!) But "[he] could get used to it". (WITH ME!!!) For God's sake can this boy be any more lovable?!?!?

OK FINE I'LL CONVERT. Are you happy, Mormons? Damn but y'all are devious.

Benji Schwimmer makes me wanna get TIVO. Like, YESTERDAY.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go lay down for a bit of private time. Toodles!

PS: Props also go to Donyelle, his partner, who I admire muchly. Also to Heidi, because she looked so lovely and graceful, and, y'know, because she'll be family soon and all.

PPS: Oh yeah, CNTM was fine. I'm beginning to hate Sisi less (but only a bit!), I thought Tenika should have been booted, and Brandi IS Thandie Newton, even if she was a bit of a drunk. But nowhere NEAR as drunk as Mary Murphy apparently is. All the time. And what is UP with that cackle? I swear she must have been doing a line or 3 during the commercial breaks. This lady out-Paula's Paula!



At 12:36 a.m., Blogger Kat said...

Did you see our boy out there tonight! That was seriously the best thing I've seen in ages! I thought of you when he was dancing! haha

At 7:15 a.m., Blogger Toya said...

He was so awesome! (As was Donyelle.) They were my favorite couple last night.

At 11:27 a.m., Blogger Cowgirl Warrior said...

Benji rocked last night, I actually said out loud "Go Benji". Can I come to the wedding?
I thought Tenika should have gone too. I like Natalie. Sisi bugged me less too. I do think the girl that had the Janet Jackson incident spent a long time trying to cover up. Loved the rugby players though :)

At 3:27 p.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

Kat: Wasn't it though??? I was squealing the whole time. The dogs were afraid, I think.

Toya: I was sooooo happy to learn that they were paired. Donyelle is one of my faves too!

CW: Heck YES you're coming to the wedding! I was saying many things out loud too... things like "ohmigod take me NOW" might have made it past my lips... :D And what about those rugby players! I can't believe ONE team had that many good looking guys in it. How cute was it when Whitby Boy gave Andrea his number! Woo woo rugby! ;)

At 1:03 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

WHEN DID HE SHOW HIS ABS?! OMG DID I MISS IT?!!?!? Sorry for the caps, lol. I've just been watching him over and over and over, from the clip on the web, but I dont see anything where he shows his abs or lifts up his shirt???

Pleeeaaase reply back!

At 1:12 a.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

Hi Anon! Oh yes, we caught a glimpse of his tighty whitey abs. It was during the opening segment, where they introduced all the dancers and they did a mini solo-esque thing. Our Benji Boy lifted up his shirt. All too briefly, I might add.

I can't find a clip of it, but believe me, the very NANOSECOND that I find it, it's going in the Benji Schwimmer Video Collection.

At 1:21 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

Omg! :O I can't believe I missed that. I'm waiting for it to come out via torrent or something, because I NEED more Benji, and in good video quality, too lol!

I found your site by accident, meaning I have nooo clue how I found it. But I'm so glad I did. Although it makes me kind of jealous knowing I have some competition for him :P hehe That dance just sealed the deal for me. Nothing sexier than a man who can mooove his body! *drools* ;)

At 4:45 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

I also wonder two things:

1. Do you think Benji wears boxers, boxer briefs, or briefs? :|

2. I'm curious about YOUR starsign (The_Glitterati). For some reason I'm hoping you're a Taurus lol :)

At 12:01 p.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

Anon@2:21: I'm glad you found me too! Welcome to The Benji Schwimmer Online Harem! :) I think his 'bootay' dance won over a LOT of people, Benji for the win!!!

1.) I'm inclined to think that Benj is a briefs kind of guy. Or at least boxer briefs. What will all the twirling and jumping and flipping and gyrating he does.... a man's gotta have some... er, support, ya know? (Whew, did it just get hot in here?)

2.) Me? Naw, I'm an Aquarius. Explains all the insanity around here, I think. Why did you think Taurus? It was my stubborn claims on Benji's affections and my bull-in-a-china-shop subtlety, wasn't it.

At 2:00 p.m., Blogger Janisa said...

Hey, did you ever find the clip where he flashed his abs? I think I have it on my Tivo, I watched it like 5 times! i couldn't believe he did that. He's too cute! So if anyone can tell me how to get it from my Tivo to your video collection just lemme know!

At 2:24 p.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

Hey Janisa,

Yep, some kind soul put it up on youtube, it's in the collection. But thanks so much! And I know what you mean, I watch that thing, like, 5 times A DAY! :)

At 2:43 p.m., Blogger Janisa said...

OK, so yeah, right after I posted that I found your video collection and have spent the last glorious hour watching some of the clips. Whooee! Good stuff. So another question, has anyone figured out Benji's very extended and complex family tree? And how on earth did he get into the Mormon thing? I think his parents are 15-time world champions Donnie Burns and Gaynor Fairweather, so how in tarnation did he end up with the last name Schwimmer, and where does David fit into the family? I'm corn-fused.

At 1:32 a.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

Hm... I haven't dug much into that, but I know his sister Lacey dances, and of course, Heidi is his cousin. David Schwimmer is supposedly a cousin, according to that Hollywood Access or whatever clip.

As for his parents, I was under the impression that his dad's name is Buddy Schwimmer and his mom's is Laurie Schwimmer.

Sorry I couldn't be more help... they've got a whole clan of swinging relatives, those Schwimmers!

At 12:17 p.m., Anonymous JaNeal said...

You are a riot!!! I love your site!! I'm a Benji fan, of course!! I'm also Mormon. I'm sure his parents are Latter Day Saints (as we prefer to be called but don't mind "Mormon"). Obviously he's pretty commited having walked away from dancing for 2 years to do what he said was more important... gotta love him. Don't worry, we'll welcome you with open arms after your conversion... and send me a wedding announcement!! Oh yeah, I'd stick with your boxer brief idea... just seems right!

At 1:03 p.m., Blogger Queen said...

And i have gotten to dance with him during a competion in Nashville

At 8:33 p.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

JaNeal: Thanks for visiting, and being such a good sport about my atrocious lack of knowledge about religions other than my own! (And honestly, I don't even know THAT much about mine!) But anyway, I do admire his dedication... he had such a fantastic positive attitude about it all in the interviews! See you at the wedding reception! ;)

Queen: Lucky you!!! Was he simply a dream to dance with? :D

At 1:11 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

JaNeal, if you are a Mormon, you would know the answer to "boxers or briefs". It would be neither...if he's a returned missionary, he would wear the "other thing" as all good Mormons do (or are supposed to). If you are not sure what I mean, ask any adult devout Mormon about it.

At 2:15 p.m., Blogger JaNeal said...

Wow, someone questioning my "Mormonism" becuase I didn't get specific about his undies? Dear anonymous, if you are LDS then you know I wouldn't get specific about it and that boxer briefs are a pretty safe way of describing what he wears. I'm a very joyful lifer, born and raised, and temple recommend holding! If you doubt me again I'll have to share my testimony!! You can go to my blog for that!

At 2:27 p.m., Blogger JaNeal said...

... and anonymous, now that you've offered up the "neither" option are you going to explain to our non-member friends on this blog what "the other" means? I will. Before Benji went on his mission he went to one of our temples and made special convenants, promises between him and the Lord. It's a special ceremony that we hold very sacred in our faith. As a reminder of his covenants he wears special white undergarments that look like a t-shirt and a pair of boxer briefs that goes to his knees. Most dancers and athletes do not wear these while "on the job". Now you know exactly what kind of underwear Benji wears. We usually don't talk about them becuase they are so special to us and since they seem peculiar to others we don't want to open them up to ridicule. The church is true!!! See, now you made me bear my testimony on Gliterati's blog!! I'm keeping it light from now on I promise!

At 7:18 p.m., Blogger The Glitterati said...

JaNeal: Thanks for the clarification, and for sharing your knowledge! I'm sure Anon meant no harm (at least, I hope not!). I think it's very cool that you are so into your faith, but that you respect others' opinions at the same time, and with a wonderful sense of humour about it too!

At 3:26 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, I certainly meant no harm. For reasons of my own, I'm no longer active in the Church, but I certainly still do have respect for it. I didn't think that was an appropriate subject to be discussing on a public message board; thus was my reference as 'the other'. My apologies....

At 7:44 a.m., Blogger JaNeal said...

Wow, don't I feel sheepish... a little offense was taken but all better now. Went over the internet edge... my excuse is 4 kids home for the summer and by 3:30pm on a good day I'm starting to feel a little edgy. Love the kids, don't get me wrong, but the end of July is why Mom's invented summer camp ;)
Anon, agree not the ideal place for such info but just know Benjifans have wild imaginations (ie: Benjelle) and if you offer up the option of neither one could get quite creative with that!! Thought it was better to clarify rather than sending everyone on a search that would turn up explanations not appropriate at all.
If you think about it other faiths wear "stuff" to show their devotion. Veils, prayer shawls, only dresses, bonnets, etc. we just wear ours underneath; and hope our lives are a reflection. That's one of the things I adore about Benji is he hasn't been ashamed and he just shows his joy all the time. A fangirl waxing philosophical about Benji, I even used him as an example in my Sunday School class last Sunday!! Is that fun or pathetic?
Anon, it's rare to be inactive and still respectful. That's nice. wish you all the best. And my apologies, too.
And Glitter, you're the best! It's nice to have a place where Mom's, grad students, and cowgirls can come together in peace and mutual respect over Benji and cosmetic obsession!!

At 12:20 p.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just wanted to answer one of the questions I read on the board. Benji doesn't wear boxers, briefs, or boxer briefs. He wears garments which are the mormon underwear.

At 1:32 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said...

listen everybody you all think that you are going to get benji but the truth is that i am going to get him because i love him more :D


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